var limit = 31;
var quote = new Array();
// var quote = new String[limit+1];
// String[] quote = new String[limit+1];
quote[0] =
"All we are saying, is give pizza chants.";
quote[1] =
"A Freudian slip is where you say one thing, but mean your mother.";
quote[2] =
"Gene Police! You - Outta the Pool!";
quote[3] =
"Xenophobia is the fear of strangers."
+ "
" +
"Zenophobia is the fear of getting half way there.";
quote[4] =
"The Feymann algorithm for solving difficult problems (as reported by Murray Gel-Mann):"
+ "
" +
" 1) write down the problem"
+ "
" +
" 2) think very hard"
+ "
" +
" 3) write down the solution";
quote[5] =
"The Resident Scot has a theory as to why human beings developed"
+ "
" +
"language: it developed so we could tell one another whether the cat"
+ "
" +
"has been fed.";
quote[6] =
"Q: What happens to the rest of an uncompleted sen"
+ "
" +
"A: g that happens to a sentence that starts in the middle.";
quote[7] =
"My parents just came back from a planet where the dominant lifeform"
+ "
" +
"had no bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this stupid F-Shirt.";
quote[8] =
"There are only 10 kinds of people in the world --"
+ "
" +
" Those who understand binary, and those who don't."
quote[9] =
"Non omnia possumus omnes"
+ "
" +
"(We cannot all do everything (Virgil))";
quote[10] =
"As someone once observed, everyone has an inborn ability to"
+ "
" +
"understand Italian.";
quote[11] =
"Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about"
+ "
" +
" telescopes. -- E. W. Dijkstra";
quote[12] =
"You can drive out nature with a pitchfork but it always comes roaring back"
+ "
" +
"again -- Tom Waits channeling Horace";
quote[13] =
"That's not the road, that's only a map -- Tom Waits";
quote[14] =
"Got to get behind the mule in the morning and plough -- Tom Waits";
quote[15] =
"Here's to the sun god!"
+ "
" +
"He sure is a fun god!"
+ "
" +
"Ra! Ra! Ra!";
quote[16] =
"Question: What are kettle drums called?"
+ "
" +
"Answer: Kettle drums.";
quote[17] =
"Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time."
+ "
" +
" -- Steven Wright";
quote[18] =
"Live all you can; it's a mistake not to. It doesn't so much matter what you"
+ "
" +
"do in particular, so long as you have your life. If you haven't had that"
+ "
" +
"what have you had?"
+ "
" +
" -- Henry James";
quote[19] =
"Ring the bells that still can ring"
+ "
" +
"Forget your perfect offering"
+ "
" +
" -- Leonard Cohen";
quote[20] =
"Remember: anti-collectivism only works if everybody does it!";
quote[21] =
"La dernière démarche de la raison est de reconnaître qu'il y a une"
+ "
" +
"infinité de choses qui la surpassent; elle n'est que faible, si elle ne"
+ "
" +
"va jusqu'à connaître cela. Que si les choses naturelles la surpassent,"
+ "
" +
"que dira-t-on des surnaturelles?"
+ "
" +
" -- Pascal, Blaise, 267";
quote[22] =
"Le coeur a ses raisons que la raison ne connaît point."
+ "
" +
" -- Pascal, Blaise, 277";
quote[23] =
"Someone has calculated that there are in Europe 26 organizations that have"
+ "
" +
"been in continuous existence for at least five hundred years: the Parliament"
+ "
" +
"at Westminster, the Althing (parliament) of Iceland, the Roman Catholic"
+ "
" +
"Church, and 23 universities."
quote[24] =
"You may ask yourself: Well? How did I get here? -- David Byrne";
quote[25] =
"\"I read somewhere,\" Smiley said, \"an historian, ... he wrote of generations"
+ "
" +
"that are born into debtors' prisons and spend their lives buying their way"
+ "
" +
"to freedom. I think ours is such a generation. Don't you?\""
+ "
" +
" -- John le Carre, The Honourable Schoolboy";
quote[26] =
"A man, a plan, a canoe, pasta, heros, rajahs, a coloratura, maps,"
+ "
" +
"snipe, percale, macaroni, a gag, a banana bag, a tan, a tag, a banana"
+ "
" +
"bag again (or a camel), a crepe, pins, Spam, a rut, a Rolo, cash, a"
+ "
" +
"jar, sore hats, a peon, a canal -- Panama!";
quote[27] =
"I can't believe God recognizes any form of blasphemy. -- J.D. Salinger"
quote[28] =
"The thing about Laurel and Hardy movies that you can't get from the"
+ "
" +
"chopped-up versions on television is how beautiful they are. Things happen"
+ "
" +
"at exactly the right moment they have to happen. They don't happen a"
+ "
" +
"second too soon or too late. You can even predict what's going to happen"
+ "
" +
"-- and it does happen -- and it surprises you anyway. It doesn't surprise"
+ "
" +
"you because it happened, but because it happened so perfectly."
+ "
" +
" I laughed so hard that I cried."
+ "
" +
"
-- Daniel Pinkwater"
quote[29] =
"Man, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks"
+ "
" +
"he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief"
+ "
" +
"occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species,"
+ "
" +
"which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest"
+ "
" +
"the whole habitable earth and Canada."
+ "
" +
"
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary"
quote[30] =
"ME, pro."
+ "
" +
"The objectionable case of I. The personal pronoun in English has three"
+ "
" +
"cases, the dominative, the objectionable and the oppressive. Each is all"
+ "
" +
"three."
+ "
" +
"
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary"
quote[31] =
"Capitalism is the astounding belief that the most wickedest of men will do"
+ "
" +
"the most wickedest of things for the greatest good of everyone"
+ "
" +
"
-- John Maynard Keynes"
var rand_no = Math.floor(Math.random()*(limit+1));
document.write(quote[rand_no]);